" Parentsparanoia" it calls the British sociologist Franc Furedi, as if "Helicopter Parenting" designate it American psychologists, meant are the continuous monitoring of the own child, which accepts nearly already hysterische extents particularly in England and the USA. In addition, with us becomes ever more everyday.



As reason for the monitoring of the child many parents call the fear of kidnapping.

Control around the clock

Arm bands with GPS are to already protect in some hospitals the newborn children against kidnapping, special Kinderhandys order likewise over global the Positioning so called system, for larger children give it even small direction-finding transmitters, which can be inserted into the attraction things. Then jacket or shoes as it were strikes alarm on the computer of parents, if the child moves from the before marked out range. Children can be located via satellite - presupposed there is a connection to the satellite, which no more is possibly the case, as soon as the child enters into a car or enters a house.

For sure you can go also too far

For young people there are already intelligent credit cards, those in America the purchase of weapons, alcohol and cigarettes forbids and a security system with camera for the car, which permits a certain radius of the distance of the parents' house apart from a maximum speed also only. If the teenager does not adhere to it, parents are informed immediately by mobile phone.

Children are not responsible for the parental luck

If one asks parents, who would like to guard their child as around the clock as possible, after the reason, then usually the fear called before kidnapping, stirred up also by the media, the cases like that the small Madeleine McCann to cannibalize in detail. Actually however the numbers of disappeared children are in the last years not at all risen and probably play at least unconsciously completely different factors a role. "Children experience a meaning change in our society", so Stefan Hetterich of the education, youth and family advisory board in Regensburg. "Today the children are located representatively of the own luck in many families. They became a kind possession for parents and in their own kind and their personal character were seen less, but rather than 'a component' of their parents. That leads to the fact that these - there her its children a so high meaning attach - which children, their development and their everyday acting like their eyeball to guard and also would like to control more strongly."

Continuous monitoring offers only pseudo security

Nowadays many children spend their spare time extremely planned, play instead of on free corridor on visible indoor playgrounds and from parents hang-driven everywhere and are again fetched. In former times one is to foot to the school, even then, if a dangerous crossing were on the way, one spent its afternoons outside and did not get themselves also with the Werkeln at the tree house not equal a blood poisoning. One drove bicycle without helmet, Inliner without knee protection and mostly knew parents not so completely exactly, where one straight was - except one came home, because one needed a plaster. Today children, those are valid the whole afternoon alone outside for ' herumstreunen' nearly already as neglects. " In the meantime supervising of the children frequently practiced leads to a form of pseudo security for the parents" , so the psychologist. And its colleague Franz brown Miller supplements: "Obtain the feeling of control of the own child. At the same time however each child has the comparison with others alone by his growing, and by its internal the urge after independence and Autonomie." But it needs stop and assistance in the form of guidance by parents.

Youth need free space, in order to be able to make experiences

Wrongly understood control leads however to the fact that the child at all does not get the chance to become independent and with challenges grow, which avenges itself at the latest in puberty. Because then it concerns to separate primarily from the parents' house to and become independent. "Puberty walk after free spaces and the faith of parents to its children that they take a good development in these free spaces können." The familytherapeut warns of exaggerated struggles for power or too long remaining in the nest warmth of the parents' house.
"Not think capable of" can be humiliating

The more monitoring technology you use, the less a child learns to move also on unknown terrain. It feels the parental distrust and interprets it as "not think capable of". It brings its parents automatically in connection with the term "controle" .

Use technical achievements appropriately

The achievements of the modern times can quite have their advantages. "A mobile phone can quite be the child an assistance and make easier it to move away from the parents' house and not conquer own autonomy areas - so long it not to the controller becomes. An adequate employment of modern technical possibilities can quite arrange ' for the child; I think capable of you that you can go out with your abilities into the life - and if you need me, I am here for you".

Children must capture their own world

Simplified one could now say: "Think simply more capable of to your child !", but thus one becomes not fair the internal needs of parents, who would keep their new generation most of all around the clock in the eye. According to Hetterich can improve only somewhat, if the origin of the fears is uncovered and the view of parents of the needs of the child after uneinsehbaren free spaces is directed. In addition, at the same time the needs of parents and their fear must be noticed and respected. Also Furedi guesses/advises in its book " The Elternparanoia - why children courageous parents brauchen" to having more confidence into the abilities of our children. Finally the childhood is not time of the dangers and risks, against which the small ones would have to be protected continuously. On the contrary, who packs its child in cotton wool and does not leave no more from the eyes, it prevents a piece far to capture the world.